Living with your significant other isn’t like having another roommate. There are some choices and situations you just won’t find with a friend or a stranger. To make sure you’re both happy with the living arrangement, there are no hidden resentments and an argument you both regret later is averted, here are some things you need to do when moving in together.
1. Pick a Place That’s the Right Location for Both of You
Whether you’re moving into his place, he’s moving into yours or you’re getting a new apartment altogether, it’s not just one person’s lifestyle that needs to be taken into account — both of yours do. It’s important to lay out what you absolutely need in a location and understand that your significant other’s needs can be just as pressing. What do you have to have, and what can you compromise on? Do you need to be in a great neighborhood? Does he need to keep his commute time the same? Can you compromise on a place with fewer amenities to keep drive time from going up?
2. Invest in Storage
Smashing two apartments together is going to be a cluttered business. You don’t need three couches, and that second mirror is too much. Weeding out what the apartment doesn’t need practically is easy enough, but when it comes to deciding what sentimental or
luxury items can be thrown out, it’s harder. Does your significant other really need that DVD collection? Do you have to have that many jackets? You can avoid the “Yeah, I used to have this awesome thing before she made me throw it out,” situation by putting the extras no one wants to part with in storage. It’s not lost forever, but it’s not in the way. For those things you can’t store, knowing how to properly organize is key, especially when he insists you
don’t need that many kinds of face cream.
3. Get the Expenses in Writing
Even if you trust each other explicitly, money has ruined better relationships — or at least led to a number of fights. Dividing up the expenses shouldn’t be something done in passing or on a verbal agreement; write out exactly who is paying for what and what exactly each person can individually afford. If your significant other can only afford a certain amount of rent, don’t find a costlier apartment just because you “can make up for that.” The “I pay more than you” argument will come around in a moment of anger sometime in the future. If you don’t want to pay it 50/50, then make sure she is in charge of paying for something that is just as valuable. It will prevent confusion when the bills come in and put a quick end to any argument or resentment.
4. Decide What You Really Can’t Stand
All relationship advice includes the rant, “compromise, compromise, compromise,” but before you ever start moving the dining set, know exactly what you can’t compromise on. If he doesn’t put down the toilet seat, you can stand that. But can you stand her playing pop music throughout the kitchen while he does dishes? Can you stand the way he likes to chat in the morning while you’re just trying to get coffee in peace? Don’t wait until you’re already moved in to lay down the ground rules — decide if you can both abide by them early.
[tweetthis]Toilet seat a pet peeve? Make a list of uncompromisables before moving in with your #boyfriend.[/tweetthis]
[tweetthis]Makeup taking over? Make a list of uncompromisables before moving in with your #girlfriend.[/tweetthis]
5. Divide the Chores and Stick to Them
Nothing leads to an argument quite like the division of labor. Who pulls more weight with the chores, or whose turn is it to take out the trash? These domestic issues can grow into the biggest irritations, so list out exactly what needs to be done and how often. That way you always know exactly what needs to be done without dispute. It’s not his turn to do the dishes; it’s always yours, just like you’re always confident that he’ll keep the place vacuumed. It not only creates harmony in the home, it cuts down on the irritating repeat questions of “whose turn is it to dust?”
6. Learn About Proper Timing
When you lived apart and only saw each other on weekends and evenings, it was easy to cancel if you were feeling stressed or save a certain topic until the next time you saw him. When you’re together, it’s tempting to address every matter immediately — why shouldn’t you? She’s in the same room. But if your significant other had a hard day at work or a little less sleep than he needed the night before, talking about bills or bringing up a problem you have right then isn’t the right time. It doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be talked about — just at a better time.
Do you have any additional tips for moving in with a significant other? Share them with us below! 
